Between Yesterday and Tomorrow

Driving back to Canada last week I found myself in the middle of nowhere. Not all those endless Interstate miles, but somewhere between yesterday and tomorrow. 

With my heart still in West Texas, I longed for what had been. As I drove and pined, someone special counselled “You gotta let it go darlin. Focus on moving forward and not what you left behind.” But as I looked forward to what the summer might bring, I was gripped with apprehension. Having left the security of my special place, the prospect of my summer job filled me with anxiety. Adrift between what was and what might be, I felt disoriented in the present. So, in an effort to clear my head I went for a three hour stroll around down-town Toronto. It was just what I needed.

Starting in the gay village where men held hands and smiled in love, I made my way to Yorkville where Gino’s revved Ferrari engines and fashionable women were dressed to the nines. Passing through the U of T campus and Queen’s Park, Queen St. took me to Chinatown where I stopped for a bowl of pho, or Vietnamese soup. Packs of young asian girls shuffled their feet while giggling to themselves incessantly. Boisterous young black guys laughed about the need to brush ones teeth as techno bumped from trendy storefronts and tweakers asked for change.

Smiling at murals I’ve admired for years, the latest pieces of graffiti kept me looking for more. Walking west along Bloor St the Annex buzzed, a homeless man reminding passersby to be happy. From Christie Pits to Bloordale, I stepped into Sweet Pete’s bike shop where I was welcomed home by friends with arms wide.

Walking around town under blue skies I couldn’t help but smiling. Clearing my mind of longing for the past or fear of the future, each step reminded me of where I was. And where I am, regardless of where I find myself, is a place of beauty and wonder, all I needed to do was open my eyes to it.